let every breath

My sweet little Ally has severe scoliosis. Her mom pulled me aside the first day I met their family at Meet the Teacher. She asked to talk to me in private. Ally has severe scoliosis, a major curve in her spine. She is probably going to have to have a major surgery this year, and she is going to be in a brace and could miss multiple weeks of school. I requested that she has a female teacher, as I want her to feel comfortable. I could tell how concerned her mom was. Can you imagine? A nine year old girl whose spine is curving the wrong way. Knowing your daughter is going to undergoing a major procedure when she still believes in the toothfairy. I assured her mom that I would keep an eye on her daughter, that I'd support her in any way I can, and that I'd be very flexible and understanding with how much school she misses. Ally bounds around the room and the world with no hesitation. She’ll come up to me and update me about her hospital visits and possible surgery, with a look of ...

Last year I had 15 students and I didn’t realize that was pure bliss. I mean, to be fair, it was also my first year teaching and I was all but making up my own curriculum and one of my students was virtual so I had to be on Zoom all day (my goodness I don’t miss that), but nonetheless. 15 students. FIFTEEN STUDENTS!!! This year? 25. I have 25 cute little wild beings who I’m supposed to keep from killing each other and dry their tears and listen to their stories of what they did last night and what they ate this morning and help them understand why it’s not okay to say, Miss Seals can you please move my seat because I don’t like sitting next to him since he’s annoying and oh yeah - teach. I’ve heard somewhere that after, like, 22 kids - every additional kid is like adding 3 more. And now I get it. There’s this magic number, I’d say around 19, where there’s just the right amount of energy and voices in the room. And then, suddenly, it’s like a bomb went off and there’s bodies everywhere...

  Today was a doozy. I was telling my fellow teacher friend I had a bad day and he said, “Was it a doozy?” and I said, “Yes, in fact, it WAS a doozy.” And it wasn’t just a doozy. It was a MAJOR doozy. Like there were a few moments there I legitimately thought I was going to lose my mind and, quite possibly, my career. Would you like to know some of the reasons my day came straight from the land of the doozes? Well, for one, I am 99% sure it was the first time since the first week of school that I have actually had all 25 of my children. That would be reason enough to make today crazy. But lucky for you, that’s just the beginning. It was late start Wednesday, which basically means the kids show up an hour late and somehow forget to bring their brains and and any sense of self-control they may have (which is questionable, in some cases) with them. Every. Single. Time. There was a perimeter lockdown. I didn’t know why so I couldn’t tell my kids what it was. Of course, everyone’s...