For You

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Tonight I feel discouraged. I'm just tired. I'm tired of teaching online and in person. I'm tired of showing up to work unprepared - constantly deciding between the quality of the day I give my kids and the quality of my life outside of work. I'm tired of weekends with what I'm going to do for the next week - Bible, math, reading, reading groups, writing, science, transferring it online, and it continues - hanging over my head. 

I have a girl, Alyssa, who stole my heart from the beginning. I call her Lil Lyssa. She's just the sweetest thing. I was gone for a day last week and when I came back, she marched right into the classroom and declared, "Miss Seals, I missed you so much when you were gone! I need a hug!" Later, someone was complaining about school and she said, "What?! Miss Seals was gone for one day and I missed her SO much!"

I have never known a kid to be so thoughtful of others - past just thoughtful actions. She is genuinely thinking about other's experiences, no matter where they are. At the beginning of the year, one of her classmates moved across the country and she came up to me, out of nowhere, and said, "Miss Seals, I hope Otter is making new friends. He moved somewhere all alone. That must be really hard."

I may be her teacher but her acts of kindness make me feel like I'm the one sitting at the desk. I may be the one who sets the tone of the classroom, but I know there are times her light shines far brighter than my own.

And so tonight Alyssa, when I'm so exhausted and my lunch isn't packed and my papers aren't graded and seven more weeks seems like too much? I'm going to go to bed and I'm going to wake up and I'm going to make sure to make tomorrow a really good day. Tonight I don't feel like I have it in me, but I'm going to find the strength to do it anyways. This one's for my little kids. This one's for you. 

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